Written by Catherine Stothart, Leadership Coach | Essenwood Consulting (December 2025)

Years ago, the typical management style was ‘command and control’.  Then it developed in the 70s and 80s into ‘situational leadership’.  Now the context has changed again, due to the growth in hybrid working and differing expectations of younger people.  The question for managers has shifted from “how can I get the most out of people?” to “how can I support people to perform at their best?”.

Managers are now expected to be less directive and more supportive.  You can do this by adopting a coaching style.  But there are mental barriers that stop managers using a coaching style.  And when they do take the plunge, there are some common pitfalls.  

This article is based on my experience as a partner in Google’s Mastery Faculty of virtual facilitators, delivering training in coaching skills to line managers, and on my experience as a Coach working with Airbus and other organisations.  

I cover:

• How to reframe your mental barriers to coaching
• Tips for avoiding the common pitfalls.

REFRAMING THE BARRIERS

Learning and applying any new skill usually requires a change in attitude and mindsets.  These are the barriers that were most often mentioned during the Google programme. 

‘I don’t have time to coach’

You might think that coaching takes longer than telling someone what to do.  The best way to overcome this belief is to try it and see how much you can achieve in 10-15 minutes.     

A short coaching conversation can result in effective solutions.  People take responsibility, are more committed to their actions and more confident in their ability to solve problems. 

‘I don’t know when to coach and when to direct’

There are some situations - in a crisis or emergency, or with new team members – when you might need to direct.  In other situations – such as with complex problems or where there is not one obvious answer – coaching could be more effective. 

You can assess what situations fit where on this spectrum. You can also move along the spectrum when appropriate.  For example, you might start by taking a coaching approach, then later you might give advice.

‘They expect me to tell them what to do’

It can be hard to resist the sense that you ‘should’ be telling people what to do.  But you can’t know everything about the jobs of the people working for you.  This is both unrealistic and inefficient – no one person has all the answers…your job as a leader is to harness the collective intelligence of your teams.

Google managers had to suppress the urge to jump to solving the problem for their coaches.  Once they had tried out coaching and seen the results, they became more confident in using a coaching style.   

‘They might come up with the wrong answer’

You can make a conscious decision on whether to allow your team member to implement their ideas, or whether to advise (or tell) them to act differently.  

TIPS FOR AVOIDING COMMON PITFALLS

I use the GROW model in my own coaching, and this is what we taught Google managers because it’s simple enough to remember easily.  Even so, there were some common pitfalls:

‘I don’t feel comfortable asking questions’

Tip 1: Build up a bank of generic open questions

When managers are new to coaching, they can struggle to come up with suitable open questions, so we shared with them some typical questions to start them off. 

Asking open questions, without knowing the direction the conversation would take, was uncomfortable for many managers.  Practising with the GROW[i] model gave them a flow and sense of control.  It helped them structure and focus the conversation and they saw the powerful impact on the coachee of asking open questions.  

Lack of clarity on the goal

Tip 2: Take time to clarify the Goal before discussing solutions

Often I observed that a team member would present a problem, and the manager would assume (incorrectly) they understood the issue and what the coachee wanted to achieve. 

I advised managers to spend time asking ‘goal’ questions, to establish what the coachee wanted to achieve in relation to the problem.  I also encouraged them to make a note of the goal and to keep it front of mind during the conversation.

This helps to keep the discussion and the coachee on track.  It also means you can ensure the goal is realistic – something they can have some impact and influence on.  Sometimes the goal can be too big for one discussion, and it may be more effective to narrow it down to one aspect and come back to other aspects later.

Little grounding in the current situation

Tip 3: Explore the Reality before rushing ahead to explore Options

Some managers automatically went into brainstorming mode, without first letting the coachee ‘ground’ themselves by recalling the current reality - what has happened so far, who has been involved, what they have tried to resolve the issue, etc. 

Taking time to do this enables the coachee to be fully present and immersed in the issues – an essential step before considering options for solutions. 

Rushing to the solution

Tip 4: Take time to explore all Options

I encouraged managers to ensure they asked several questions around Options – and to ask open questions, not questions that lead their coachee to a particular answer.  This challenged their team members to think for themselves, and to take new perspectives on the problem, leading to new potential solutions. 

Not stating an action plan  

Tip 5: Get a Will statement

During the coaching conversation the coachee usually identified several possible courses of action and sometimes the session ended without a clear plan of next steps.  I encouraged managers to ask some ‘Will’ questions such as what they are going to do next, what their first action will be, what their plan is for implementing. 

Trying to solve the problem yourself

Tip 6: Focus on the team member, not on the problem

This is the hardest part of all for managers new to coaching.  When someone comes to us with a problem, we automatically start to think about the problem and what to do about it.  However, the aim when coaching is to enable the coachee to think about the problem and come up with potential solutions to it that they can implement.  We must focus on them and not on the problem.

Finally….

I hope this article encourages managers to adopt a coaching style, and to overcome the barriers and pitfalls.  Coaching is a powerful tool for harnessing the collective intelligence of everyone in the team.  And nowadays - with the demands of hybrid working and the expectations of Gen Z - it’s a tool that people managers can’t do without.

[i] Whitmore, J, (2002) Coaching for Performance. 3^rd edition. London, Nicholas Brealey.